Tuesday, September 11, 2012

7 x 7 Award

Oh, darling Neve. Why would you give an award like this to a self-destructive cinéaste who subconsciously deters the interest of any one like minded by being awfully sarcastic, morbid and childish? A woman who just watches her blog slowly wither away into oblivion and nothingness?

*dramatically covering eyes with arm and falling down to the floor with a loud bounce*

Please, Neve... if these are my last words... remember... The Baz... I believe... in... you... *croak*

Thank you, darling.

The point of this award is that once you are the recipient of it, you are supposed to highlight seven blog posts of your own (following the highlighted directions below), and then pass the award on to seven other bloggers you feel deserve the punishment of forced false modesty.

I will feel like a defiler of graves, since my answer to all these questions will consist of links to really old blog posts. Welcome to the Lolita Mausoleum:

1.Tell everyone something that no one else knows about you.

I believe that I already share too much about myself that you now know about me, but would prefer not to. But I can share something with you. I know that I am cool and all that. Super cool. Tough. Ice cold Queen of Scandinavia. But I'm afraid of spiders, which is totally ridiculous. Snakes - no problem, I grew up with them. I don't even mind the big, hairy tarantulas. No, the spiders I'm afraid of are those icky buggers with teenie tiny bodies and enormously long legs. (A quick Google search informed me that the correct Latin appellation is Daddy Longlegs.)
I blame my father, who traumatized my big sister by chasing her through the house with a spider in his hand. Guess he mistook her crying for hysteric laughter. So, some cognitive behavioral therapy:

2. Link to one of the posts that I think best fits the following categories:

a. Most beautiful piece:

My top 20 favorite actors. Obviously. Lots of sexy dudes there.

b. Most helpful piece:

Pictures Galore: Paul Newman. Seems like I helped my readers regain their sanity with sexy pictures of the late Mr. Newman. Going on my bitchy remark in the beginning of the post, it seems like I  in the previous post had tried to demoralize my readers by shoving post-colonialism in their cute and naïve little faces. Sorry about that.

c. Most popular piece:

According to the statistics, my review of Barbarella (1968) is the post with the most pageviews, closely followed by Ilsa, Swe Wolf of the SS (1975). Dear readers: you are filthy.

"Whaat? I'm just sittin' here lookin' all innocent with a fallic symbol in my hands."

d. Most controversial piece:

Controversial? Petite moi?

Well, perhaps The Strong White Man vs. The Rest might qualify. I was pretty brutal in my sarcasm with that blog post, and those who didn't get that... probably thought that I would enlist with the KKK any moment now. I think it was after that post I put up Groucho excaliming "Warning! Sarcastic bitch blogging" at the top of this site, for those who thought this was a genuine article:

"Interesting thing that natives from other countries can show their breasts and genitals all they want in photographs and in films, but we normal people just get censored. I bet it's because animals have no concept of moral". - A quote I just made up

I recommend to any one going the Cinema Studies route to throw yourself at a colonialism class when the opportunity arises. You may get sick to the stomach, but it's fascinating and important.

e. Surprisingly successful piece:

I'm surprised any piece of this blog is successful, if it is. But I enjoyed the reactionson Lars von Trier's Cannes fiasco (or rather, Cannes' fiasco of banning someone who just didn't express his sarcasm clear due to language difficulties)  in the comment section to my post "I understand Hitler, I do". Come on, it's one of our greatest modern auteurs. Let him be a little clumsy...

f. Most underrated piece:

Boney M. - Rasputin (1978). I am sad that so few people see the value of teaching history with the help of disco. Too further prove my point, here is the absolute, true, historically correct story of Ma Barker:

g. Most pride-worthy piece:

If one takes pride in exaltation without limit, slightly bad English and inexplicable amounts of bold text (don't ask me... I guess I thought it was a good idea at the time for those who only want to read little snippets of a text): Inglourious Basterds (2009). There's a lot of (perhaps too much) love and nerdiness there. I would love to feel that rush I had when I wrote that piece again. Without the help of cocaine, that is. (But one should never underestimate substance abuse.)

I nominate the following seven bloggers. Let your cinematic slime swirl to the surface so that it, once again, can see the light!

David C. - The Marx Brothers

Matthew Coniam - The Marx Brothers Council of Britain

Dymon Enlow - Happyotter

Kate Gabrielle - Silents and Talkies

Millie - ClassicForever

Flapper Flickers + Silent Stanzas

Particular Girl

Sunday, September 9, 2012

Weekend Fun: No. 36

No, I don't think you should have any fun this weekend. Or, if you didn't see this before you went out partying yesterday (because I didn't post it until now, but that's no excuse): Enjoy your hangover! Wuahahaha.

I have a cold. Makes me malicious. I may write something about how Sweden sucked a an Olympic team in Olympia (Leni Riefenstahl, 1938) in the next few days. But maybe I won't. Now, coffeeeee! And teeeeea! And heroiiiiiiine!

Saturday, September 1, 2012

Weekend Fun: No. 35

Dustin Hoffman and Laurence Olivier on the set of The Marathon Man (John Schlesinger, 1976).

Robert Redford and Dustin Hoffman on the set of All the President's Men (Alan J. Pakula, 1976).

It looks like Dustin Hoffman had some severe facial tics in the 1970's. Does anyone know if he still has this problem? Poor guy...

Here's a fun article on why All the President's Men wasn't filmed in the offices of The Washington Post, where Redford's and Hoffman's characters work as reporters. Apparently Redford and The Washington Post has different accounts as to the reason of the locale...

The first paragraph of the wonderfully named article "When Robert Redford and Dustin Hoffman behaved like groupies" by Judith Martin (Washington Post, Friday March 4, 2011):

On behalf of my 1970s Post colleagues, I take exception to actor Robert Redford's claim that "All the President's Men" was not filmed in the Post newsroom because "it was all giggling women and people doing their makeup and a general feeling of disorder".

Nicely put, Mr. Redford!

Saturday, August 25, 2012

Weekend Fun: No. 34

Johnny Depp is not particularly happy with Ricky Gervais' behavior hosting the 2011 Golden Globe Awards, and seeks to vent his spleen once and for all. Oh, snap!

Warwick Davis, Ricky Gervais, Stephen Merchant and Johnny Depp in Life's Too Short (2011, season 1, episode 2).

Ah, I love Ricky Gervais and Stephen Merchant. Committing to the spirit of the Olympic Games of 2012, I just finished a The Office Marathon and an Extras Triathlon - the blood taste in my mouth is making me delirious. Perhaps I need to take a look at Life's Too Short. That is, when I've recovered from all the times I've passed out, oxygen deprived from - out of pure, excruciating embarrassment - having buried my head into a cushion too violently and too frequently.

Related YouTube links: